Week 22 Results and Lessons Learned...

Up .2 lbs (30 lbs total)

I have actually been thinking about this weight gain rather than just wailing in despair (which, don't get me wrong, I have also been doing) and I have realized that I am experiencing the onset of depression. I am a depressive personality, cycling through the lows at least once a year. And food is my solace, my stress release, a way of loving myself when I feel the rest of the world doesn't. I've lost the sense of hope about the future that I have when I'm not depressed, and you need hope to diet. Unfortunately knowing I'm entering a depressive cycle is not the same as "curing" it and I'm still reaching for the food. So, my thoughts about this phase are that I just have to get through it without doing too much damage to myself - I'll eat the healthy choices when I can and try to get some exercise in and keep going to meetings. One day I will wake up with a renewed sense of joy and hope and the week will fly by and I will lose some weight, until then I am going to try and be kind to myself in as many non-food ways as I can.